Winter?

[maplelakeduckslayer]

Gf cousin from Idaho spent the night last week and we were discussing the differences in the use of fire out west vs here. He works on fire utility helicopters on a base outta Colorado. It's interesting it's just ba completely different concept out there due to environmental conditions etc.

[Fish Felon]

It shouldn't be that different....MN is just ass-backwards on it, which shouldn't be a surprise but that doesn't mean it shouldn't still piss you off.

The state should be like the Dakotas....hell, even Iowa burns the hell out of their public lands when possible. My little brother is down by Cedar Rapids....he said the DNR was burning every bit of public possible this spring when MN implemented a burning ban. Whenever there's a burning ban....that's when you want to burn....that's the only time the shit will actually burn. The biggest thing you need to be careful of is wind. A slight breeze is OK but if it's windy? Don't burn unless it's small and you have a full-proof fire break....large gravel road, river, etc. It doesn't take much to act as a fire break....when it's calm....a set of phag-wheeler tracks will do it in a lot of cases.

Anyways.....

If MN burned regularly? MN wouldn't have to worry about fires....and MN would be set up to burn. In most places....people clear the shit around their home so it won't burn if there's a fire. In MN, people love having dwellings suffocated by shit....overgrown shit like lilacs and over grown hedges....arborvitas that are bigger than most older growth pine in the state. If fire was a routine thing people wouldn't have their shit enclosed by combustible crap. It'd be more open and clear....and would probably extend the life of most buildings since shit wouldn't rot so fast.

If the state burned....people would get used to it and wise up. It should be an annual thing.

I'm convinced that MN is the hot bed for Lyme's due to fire sequestration. Why else would MN be by far and away the epicenter hotbed for Lyme's? It's not coincidence. By not burning there's exponentially more ticks....more ticks mean an exponentially higher spread of tick born illnesses. All this shit people spray and dump on the ground to get rid of ticks....fukcing retarded. Want to get rid of ticks on your property? It's real simple....

1. Don't rake....leave the leafs.
2. Once spring rolls around....as soon as the ground is dry enough....burn it. You'll have no ticks and your lawn will be the greenest, best looking grass you've ever seen.

The only risk is that in some years....it might stay wet to where you don't get a chance, but there's almost always a small window to burn even in a really wet spring.

Spring would be better for the ticks and the grass, but fall isn't bad either.

Think of how much time the average person wastes raking up leaves and moving them....composting them.....fukc that bullshit.

When the leaves are nice and evenly distributed across your lawn....torch that shit. It's better for the lawn, a lot less work, and good for the environment.


Seriously....give it a try.....you can thank me later once you do.......


Moose decline is directly related to not burning....that and wetter hydrological part of the cycle.....grouse numbers lowered.....everything.....anything wrong with anything is pretty much caused by lack of fire. The DNR can study away until they're blue in the face and come up with absolutely nothing besides the copout excuse of "climate change," and this stems from the fact that the MN DNR is a bunch of groupthink afflicted imbecile bureaucrats who'd rather see shit fukced up because then they can write some papers on it speculating about the possible causes........or you can actually fix the shit by ignoring them completely and burning shit.


Newsflash:

The DNR doesn't even put out fires. With all the hype over forest fires....you'd think they'd actually fight them.

Nope.

Do you know what DNR "fire fighting" consists of?

They show up and joy ride argo's over people's shit.

I'm dead serious.

When they get called to a fire....they get there, unload a bunch of these gay ass fukcing Argo thingy's.....and joy ride around. That's it. They don't get out to do a fukcing thing. They just joy ride Argos all over people's shit.

[maplelakeduckslayer]

Lol was that one of the game cams?

[Fish Felon]

Lol was that one of the game cams?

Yup!

I've got a lot more pics but they're more detailed and I'd be worried somehow they'd get back around and realize who I am.....wouldn't be very hard to put two and two together....and since I got off light AF....seriously, they had me dead to rights on a whole litany of charges, and tens of thousands in expenses......dude, we're talking fifteen fire truck and fire truck size or bigger rigs.....God, I want to make so many backhanded comments and jokes right now but can't....would be really reckless of me after catching a huge break....might be on the hook for a cabin that burned....well, in spots...vinyl siding is shot and melted....couple holes burnt in the side you'd have to duck slightly but could otherwise walk through......

Caught a big break....Big Break.....investigation headed up by a guy that knows who I am, was not a "regular regular" daily or even weekly patron, but a frequent regular at a place I bartended....was beloved by all and very well-liked and respected....largely for turning the place upside down and making it the coolest bar in town....the year I was there the revenue tripled, first time the establishment was in the black on their taxes with a nice fat profit in half a decade.....and I did it by being who I really am at my core....a pretty happy go-lucky, fun, charismatic, bustin' his ass bartender who treats everyone the same. Whether it's the crab ass who only tips a quarter to fifty cents....the first day on the job I grabbed this old dude's pint glass off the bar, the quarter tip he left, and was giving the spot a quick wipe with my bar rag while dude was already standing up, off his bar stool, putting his coat on....while I'm looking down wiping the bar where he'd been seated he grabbed my wrist and clamped it hard as hell, startled I looked up and this old guy had the most irate look on his face, crazy look in his eyes, and snarked loudly,

"You NEVER Grab a Patron's Tip Until AFTER They've Left the BAR!"

Which I'd bartended a while and although I was aware of that etiquette....it's just common sense shit, i.e. don't be rude, or do anything to devalue a customer, make it awkward, and lessen the enjoyment. You want it to be fun, positive, and light......but when busy and the person was already up and headed out? My bad....didn't mean to insult the guy. A lot of bartenders let shit like that bug them or will treat a patron differently forever if they pull something like that....

....me? It's Groundhog's Day. I come in happy and fresh and don't give a fukc about any of that shit....good or bad... meaning I don't treat them any worse, and I don't kiss their ass and treat them better either.

Long story short? That old crab ass had tears in his eyes when he was telling me goodbye after I crashed and burned out and left in order to adhere to my own rules.....leave your bullshit at home. If you want to be unpleasant, unhappy, and miserable to be around? Stay home then....don't bring your bullshit to any bar I'm tending.....I'll playfully call you out and either get you back on board the train to enjoying being out or mock you hard enough without crossing the line to where you'll finish your drink and be heading home.

It sucked that I melted down and fukced up a really good thing.....but at least I had the dignity to leave knowing it wouldn't ever be the same....despite a shitload of people wanting me to stay....and really only a few who wanted to see me go.....but one of them was the love of my life and I loved her, and still do, and sometimes....the best way to love someone is by leaving.....no longer have your and their worlds intersect so they can move on all the while knowing you never will....


So long story shorter......the dude investigating me knew who I am, knew my story, and I'm assuming remembered me treating him like I treated everyone....awesome....as someone who genuinely cared about them having a good time and cared to get to know them a little....I'm interested in people....generally curious to know who they are, what they do, where they're from.....because I have an uncanny knack of seeing some common ground, similar interests, similar history, and relating to them where it seems sincere....because it is. It's only happened once or twice.....but the very rare occasions when people left unimpressed or thinking I'm a bullshitter only doing it for the tips? Worst feeling in the world.....I honestly don't give a fukc about tips.....that old crab ass who grew to freaking love the hell out of me? Never tipped me more than a dollar fifty....usually it was just a quarter or fifty cents. It never affected how much I valued him as a patron. Everyone has value. If you sit and talk to anyone it's not real difficult scratching past the top layers to see they're just a human being trying to live life in this crazy good but crazy fukced up world....and the only difference between the two is how you choose to view it. The world can be a truly cold-hearted, cunning, ruthless bitch if you want it to be......but it's not that hard to see it in a positive light, and help others see it that way for a change too.....simply by being as nice and courteous to everyone whether or not they're tipping nothing or leaving you a twenty after only having a few tap beers.....everyone has value and deserves to be treated equally. If you care about people......as a bartender you'll never have to care about tips....not caring about them is what'll make you get the most of 'em.


So dude felt sorry for me, probably found it extremely sad & depressing to see me how I was when I initially lied to him....before telling the truth.....when compared to who he remembered me as when I was bartending the bar he liked to frequent.


.....and that's why I got off.....one minor citation.....could've....maybe even should've gotten jail time.

So I'd like to share more about my Spring Forest Recreational Burning Season shenanigans than I can right now......but I'd be a fool to risk fukcing up benefiting from a stroke of luck and goodwill I very much appreciate....especially since it reminds me that it was created by my own goodwill as a person, which reminds me I'm not all bad....still might be a lot of good left in me if I try again.